Friends and love, probably one of the most important concepts and words, but, as i have learned over the time, have so different meanings. Somebody you know for 20 years is a friend and somebody, who you have ‘met’ on Facebook, but possibly never in reality, has also become a friend. Somebody you are meeting for a coffee twice a year is a friend and somebody you are seeing (you know that period before two human beings become a couple) is also a friend. You love your mum and your husband and your children, but you also love that tuna sandwich and those high heels. And, of course, we love music and football and and and..
How many friends one can have? In English dictionary it says that a friend is a person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically exclusive of sexual or family relations. Are all your 476 (or whichever other number) friends on Facebook ‘friends’? Some might be less, some might be more than this definition.
And how about love? How big is year heart? Do you know what love is? Do you really love all and everything you say you love? Do you really have an intense feeling of deep affection to fish and chips or a man who just sold you a kilo of carrots?
Overuse, misuse of these words devalue their meanings, create confusions, misunderstandings, wrong expectations and signals.
I dont mind that in the food market sellers call me ‘darling’, ‘love’, ‘sweetheart’ etc etc, but it just feels like people dont think when they say. Often, it’s a very manipulative tool to break into someone’s private zone, get informal , gain trust (because, that’s what our subconscious sense would tell when hearing ‘friend’ or love) etc. But, in general people also become too lazy to use their vocabulary, to use nuances expressing their thoughts and feelings. We are saying things without actually thinking. Simple and shallow. and superficial. As if actually we dont care.